If you have ever caught yourself thinking, “I need to be a good partner, a good mom, a good friend, a good person,” only to instantly swallow your own needs, you are not alone.

For high-achieving women, being “good” often becomes tangled up with being endlessly available. So when people talk about boundaries in relationships and what they are or what they look like, your body might tense up. Maybe the concept feels foreign, or maybe it feels selfish.

Because for you, saying no does not feel like a boundary.It feels like disappointing someone.It feels like breaking an unspoken rule.It feels like you are doing something wrong.

That is the root of the struggle. Not the boundary itself, but what you learned it means about you.

Life changes rarely arrive neatly packaged. Sometimes they’re planned—new jobs, relationships, or moves you worked hard for. Other times they come unexpectedly, forcing decisions or endings you didn’t ask for. And often, they’re both exciting and unsettling at the same time.

Many women are surprised by how dysregulating transitions feel, especially when the change is something they wanted. On the outside, life may look fine. Internally, anxiety ramps up, sleep gets lighter, and it feels harder to stay grounded.

In therapy, I often ask clients about their hobbies, interests, or leisure activities. It’s a simple question—but one that frequently leads to long pauses or uncertain answers. Many people say, “I don’t really know what I like,” or list a single activity they no longer make time for. Others speak with noticeable warmth about creative outlets that once brought them joy: painting, gardening, crafting, music.

This contrast highlights something important. In a culture that prioritizes productivity, creativity and fun are often the first things to disappear—especially for high-functioning, responsible women who are used to pushing through stress and putting others first.

Yet creativity isn’t optional when it comes to healing. It’s foundational.

You know those moments when you snap at someone you love, then instantly feel shame twist in your chest? Or when you catch yourself pulling away, going cold, even though part of you craves connection? That’s unresolved trauma leaking into the present.

Maybe you don’t think of your past as “trauma.” Perhaps you tell yourself, 

“I had a good childhood.”
“Other people had it worse.”
“I should be over this by now.”

But if your body tenses before your mind understands why…
If your reactions sometimes feel too big for the moment…
If relationships feel like emotional déjà vu…

You may be carrying something old that never got the chance to heal.

You wake up, and before your eyes even fully adjust to the morning light, you’re already braced for impact. It’s that familiar knot in your stomach, the silent alarm blaring, signaling the start of another relentless day.

The never-ending to-do list. A digital scroll of tasks and responsibilities is already running through your brain at warp speed. The inbox is a battlefield; each unread email is a potential new demand on your already-stretched time. Your kid’s lunch needs packing, a seemingly simple task that, in the grand scheme of things, feels like just one more brick in the wall of your overwhelming day. 

I’ve been thinking a lot about that quiet emptiness we sometimes feel-the one that shows up even when everything in our lives seems “perfect.” You know the feeling: maybe your career is going well, your home feels settled, you’ve got a friend circle you love, and maybe even a dream trip on the calendar… and yet, something still feels missing.

Do You Struggle With Feeling Like You’re Never Enough?

Self-compassion is finally having its moment — and honestly, it’s about time.

So many of the women I work with share a common struggle: the pull of self-criticism is powerful, constant, and exhausting. It’s there in the background while they wash dishes, walk the dog, or toss and turn at night. And it’s rarely random. More often, that inner voice is an echo — the sharp tone of a parent, the impossible standards of a boss, or the subtle (and not-so-subtle) cultural pressures to be everything to everyone, without ever messing up.

For some, the critic took root early as a survival tool: If I’m hard on myself first, no one else can get to me. Others absorbed it from the way caregivers spoke about themselves, learning perfectionism and shame like a second language. Then there’s the societal weight: be thinner, be more successful, be endlessly patient, keep up with everyone else — and never show weakness.

We often talk about stress in terms of how it feels mentally—overwhelming, exhausting, nonstop. But what we don’t always talk about is how much stress gets stored in the body. And when we carry too much, for too long, it starts to throw us off physically and emotionally. If you’ve been feeling like you’re out of sync, disconnected from yourself, or just “off,” this might be why.

Let’s talk about the signs, the deeper meaning, and how to start realigning—both physically and personally.

I’ve been that person.

I remember meeting up with a friend for lunch a few years ago, excited to catch up — but before the appetizers even hit the table, I had launched into a full emotional unload. I was overwhelmed, frustrated, and in need of connection. But by the end of the meal, I could feel it — the mood had shifted. I had dominated the conversation, and my friend looked emotionally drained.

That moment stayed with me. Not because I shared — we all need to — but because I realized I hadn’t even asked if she had the capacity to hold what I was about to drop. That lunch wasn’t mutual support; it was an unintentional therapy session. And she didn’t sign up for that.

It’s 7:30 AM. You're in the kitchen, racing the clock (again), and your toddler knocks over the cup of milk you just poured. You feel your whole body tighten. You raise your voice. You curse under your breath. And then, just like that, it’s happening again—you’re spiraling into that familiar wave of guilt, frustration, and self-blame.

Meet Magaly. She’s in her 30s, has worked hard to build a career she’s proud of, and is known for being reliable, capable, and dedicated. But despite her accomplishments, she often feels like she’s not enough. In meetings, or anytime she is unsettled by something at work, she second-guesses herself and holds back from speaking up. She rereads emails ten times before sending them, worried she’ll say the wrong thing. She replays scenarios in her head, wondering how to approach issues and is searching for the perfect solution.  And at the end of the day, there’s this nagging feeling of dissatisfaction—like she’s stuck but doesn’t know how to move forward. 

If you’ve started EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) therapy, you might be wondering: Why does this feel harder before it feels better? You’re not alone. EMDR is an incredibly effective therapy for processing trauma, but it can stir up a lot of emotions before you start feeling relief. This is totally normal—and a sign that your brain is doing the deep work of healing. Let’s explore why EMDR can feel uncomfortable at first and how to navigate the challenges that come with it.

Life can be tough. We all go through experiences that shake us—some big, some small, but all capable of leaving lasting marks on our hearts and minds. Maybe it’s a painful breakup that still stings, childhood experiences that shaped how you see yourself, or a major traumatic event that you can’t seem to move past. If you’ve ever felt stuck in painful memories or overwhelmed by emotions you don’t fully understand, you’re not alone. Healing is possible, and one therapy that has helped many people find peace is EMDR—Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing.

When we think about exercise, we often picture intense workouts, sweat-drenched gym sessions, or long-distance runs. But let’s be real—sometimes, when you’re feeling down, anxious, or overwhelmed, the last thing you want to do is push yourself through a hardcore workout.

Ah February–the month of love. People either love it or hate it. For some, it’s a time to celebrate the love shared with a partner, while for others, it highlights the fact that they’re single when they’d rather not be, or it makes them question what might be “wrong” with them.

When searching for a mental health therapist, it's easy to get caught up in the qualifications of the professional or the therapeutic modality they specialize in. One term that has gained significant attention in recent years is the concept of a holistic therapeutic approach.

You wouldn’t grab a swimsuit off the rack and head straight to the checkout without trying it on, nor would you purchase a car without taking it for a test drive. The same principle applies when searching for a therapist.